Can I actually inspire anyone?

I started this blog to document my life after I was diagnosed with Lupus Nephritis Stage IV, and hopefully could inspire new patients around the world to lead a normal life again. I recalled when I was first diagnosed, I was frantically searching information on the internet to give myself hope that I will be normal again, and what I saw was other lupus patients having worse symptoms, and the only direction that lupus could turn, is to worsen. The lupus patients in the ward next to my beds are suffering frequently, and whilst I did speak to some of them, I did not have time to digest what those conversations meant to me.

It took a while for me to accept my new friend, and the adjustments that I have to make in my life. It was also not easy to accept hospital bills raking up, and that these bills need to be paid instantaneously otherwise I would not be able to receive treatment.  Continue reading “Can I actually inspire anyone?”

5 things I learnt about work and lupus after re-watching The Dark Knight

The Dark Knight (2008) was a soul shattering and nerve wrecking movie when I watched it in the cinema back then. The horror and havoc that the Joker has brought upon to Gotham city is incomprehensible and unexpectable.  I recalled having my heart hung on a string from the bank robbery scene all the way until the end where batman escaped onto a highway on his batpod. Continue reading “5 things I learnt about work and lupus after re-watching The Dark Knight”

Meru – How far are you willing to go for your dreams?

[Spoiler alert]

With lupus, I have come to terms that for the rest of my life, I will have to be grateful for the slightest possibility of being able to exercise mildly, and work with minimum stress. I reminded myself every time not to exert myself by carrying stuffs that are too heavy, not to expose myself in the sun, and not to stress myself too much over work.

I accepted the fact that I might be climbing 5a for the rest of my life. I told myself not to ever think of big walls, and longer climbs. I could not have more gratitude knowing that at least the creator gave me the chance to climb.

I have accepted the fact that I have to tone down a notch for everything, and that I will not be able to push myself to achieve more as this might tick my lupus friend off. I learnt to forgive myself and accepted that to be a way of life.

Until, of course, I watched this movie named MeruContinue reading “Meru – How far are you willing to go for your dreams?”

The face of true warriors in life

-My thoughts on attending the Mandarin SLE support forum

(中文版在英文段落后)

People said that true heroes live amongst us.

I had the honour to witness the face of the true warriors in life this very day. Continue reading “The face of true warriors in life”

Lupus Nephritis Stage IV – When it started to sink in

When I was first diagnosed with SLE, there were also blood trace and protein in my urine indicating that my kidney are also under attack. The rheumatologist advised that I get a renal biopsy to determine the extent of damage the SLE has caused to my kidney.

I was hospitalised to undergo treatment and renal biopsy. I had to collect 24 hours of my urine to obtain a more accurate reading of the level of protein leakage.

“Every time you go away, you (I) take a piece of me (you, kidney) with you (me).” Paul Young’s song could be the theme song of a biopsy room. Continue reading “Lupus Nephritis Stage IV – When it started to sink in”

Lupus – When you fight you

Ever since I started to feel the existence of my nagging inconvenience, I have been hoping that it will go away eventually. 16 days and tonnes of painkillers later, it seemed that my unknown partner is here to stay. It greeted me every morning with pain, left me alone for 7 hours, and reported to me again until I close my eyes. I could no longer go climbing, lift weights, even moving around is difficult. I decided that I needed to put a name to this nagging inconvenience of mine, and have a heart-to-heart conversation with it. Continue reading “Lupus – When you fight you”

Days in Europe (Pt 1)

Solo tripping in Germany and England with my nagging inconvenience.

Despite experiencing pain every day, I still managed to make the most out of the hours when I am less in pain, and I never regretted proceeding with the trip.

I spent one week in Germany, and another one in England.

I would say that I was an extreme optimist and hopeless romantic. Continue reading “Days in Europe (Pt 1)”